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June 08, 2004
Blech
As I see things, animal bodies are both beautiful and horrific. Or perhaps it is the way that animals, more specifically human animals, treat their bodies that are horrific.
When illness strikes is it the body rebelling against something we have done or failed to do? Or is it a result of something in our environment, determined to rid the earth of what might be seen as "a virus" to quote Mr. Smith from the Matrix.
When do you know to say to doctor's, striving to keep a failing body alive, enough! No more! This body has gone as far as nature has intended. When is the treatment worse then the disease and the subsequent consequence?
I'm very tired right now any my own body is rebelling against sitting upright. My grandmother has been transferred to LDS Hospital, thank God. She's been in the hospital for over a week now. She's doing better, but still has a lot to go through. She has a "vegetation" on her aortic valve. Some kind of bacterial growth according to the infectious disease doctors. Her heart is mush.
I love my grandmother. But I am not convinced that this agressive treatment is best for her. I feel very sad, tired and lost. And, I can't really say things like this to my aunt...my mom, I can...hell she's an administrator and social worker for her own hospice. I just feel like saying, "Enough, Grandma!! We can take care of grandpa, if you don't want to do this."
I could really use a nap right now.
Posted by Sarah at June 8, 2004 10:31 AM