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March 26, 2004
Yet another reason to why I feel so blessed.
I was going to write a discourse on commuting, since I spent an hour in traffic yesterday and it really annoyed the hell out of me. But this morning I received a reply to an email I sent to a former high school teacher who also taught me one class at Weber State University. These kinds of relationships are what make me feel blessed.
>>Sarah:
Hard times. I'm very sorry. As I assume you've not yet met with the Grad adviser in the English Dept. at the U., I hope that nothing I say has already been contradicted. But let me babble a bit.
Though it will help little to read this, the U has arrogance about admitting Weber State students. Several of my colleagues at WSU have commented on this. True, I have no quantitative proof, so take it for what it's worth. The English Dept. at the U. has an additional bias towards bringing students from outside the state. The fact that the American Studies Dept. falls under the jurisdiction of the English Dept. also more than hints at its literary slant. That you came out of the History Dept. at WSU adds up to several strikes.
USU has no such bias. I spoke with Kathyrn MacKay about their American Studies Dept., and though she knew it better years ago, she still has heard very good things about it. Have you considered applying there? True, Logan will never be SLC, but it is nearby and it is an in-state program. That has the advantage of being closer to those you love and much cheaper than most programs. I'm sure Kathryn would be delighted to discuss it with you, and Susan Matt has a good friend who teaches in the Dept at USU, so you might want to contact her as well.
You mentioned a passing interest in perhaps teaching on the secondary level. If you could find the patience to realize that they are NOT grad students, you might come to love high school kids. What of investigating that path, while you ponder grad school? It would give you the sense that you are staying connected to a university program and not merely working to pay bills. And, yes, I'm also certain that you could make history come alive! You need only find the right situation.
As for the writing, no degree's necessary for that. Write!!
I'm sorry that the rejection has battered your self-image. For what it's worth, I can relate. Still, any path is just a path. Find another and focus that marvelous intelligence and energy on it. If I can help with that, let me know. Just remember that Sisyphus remains one of my heroes.....
Please give Shera a hug and a pep talk from me, and let me hear/read from you soon, so I can learn how you are.
Love,
Jay>>
He is a great mentor. The mention of Sisyphus brought tears to my eyes - as jay taught me about him in the first class I really cared about in high school...Existentialism and Absurdism (An English Elective.) Albert Camus, a famous existential writer, wrote an essay entitled The Myth of Sisyphus. Basically, Sisyphus - an ancient king - pissed the Gods off. To punish him they gave him the task of rolling a huge boulder up a very large, steep hill, only to have it roll back to the bottom again once he has neared the top. Camus writes, "But Sisyphus teaches the higher fidelity that negates the gods and raises rocks. He too concludes that all is well. This universe henceforth without a master seems to him neither sterile nor futile. Each atom of that stone, each mineral flake of that night filled mountain, in itself forms a world. The struggle itself toward the heights is enough to fill a man's heart. One must imagine Sisyphus happy. " To "scorn" the Gods, Sisyphus takes pride in his task and continuously rolls the boulder up the hill.
It is truly a beautiful myth. One that makes me realize, once again, that I am in more control than I previously thought.
Posted by Sarah at March 26, 2004 08:00 AM
Comments
your teacher is right. :)
and you should write. you've already got everything you need, to do that. and MORE!! i hope you'll consider doing NaNoWriMo with me next fall.
Posted by: jodi at March 26, 2004 12:20 PM